How do you say...

Lately, I've had some really great offers for sex. I'm talking, the guys that are offering (not in a creepy way, just you know, letting me know, that it's on the menu if I choose to order) are handsome, professional, funny - all in all, pretty decent guys.

However, as much as I want to order off the menu....appetizers, dinner and dessert - I find myself in limbo.  I'm getting to the stage in my life where I'm trying to do things differently.  As you might have guessed from the title of this blog, I'm in the market for a boyfriend, but have no idea what I'm doing.  I do know this: What I've done in the past has definitely not worked. (I may have been kind of slutty in my past- or if we want to say it in a nicer manner, I've never hesitated to order off the menu if something looks delicious).  Needless to say, past = doesn't work --> me= in limbo.

I am finding that the most awkward part of this is explaining to said handsome man why I'm not going to just order off the menu.  Here is my thought process.  1) I think this person has potential and I'd like to get to know this person and order off the menu later.  2) If i tell this person "NO" right off the bat, they are going to think I have no interest what-so-ever and move along. 3) How do I tell this person that I want them to just keep trying after I say no like three times, and then they'll probably get what they want. 3b) But if we start liking each other in the meantime, that's what I really want. 4) disclaimer: if I don't end up liking this person, this person is definitely not getting what he wants.

To wrap this all up without sounding totally obsessive and neurotic is a tough chore.

I know you are probably shaking your head right now and saying, "Girl, just say, 'I'm interested, but not in ordering off the menu right away'." (side note: if you haven't caught on yet, when I'm saying "ordering off the menu" I'm definitely talking about having sex).


Well back to what you were saying; Believe me, I've tried saying, "I'm interested, but I'm not going to sleep with you right now,"  and it doesn't work.  So the NEXT thing people tell me is, "Well, he's just an a$$hole, you shouldn't want to date him anyway."  Cute, real cute advice.  Let me tell you, reader, that if we thought every dude that wanted to sleep with us was an a$$hole, we'd really have no viable men left. And if a man, or anybody for that matter, is feeling some strong chemistry, there will be some physical flirtation, and somebody will make a move.  Unfortunately in my experience, I've noticed that men don't have much of a grey area.  It's either all or nothing once the blood starts flowing - and no, that one wasn't an analogy.


I really, don't have an ending to this story this time; just confusion mostly on how in the heck do I deal with this situation?


Sound advice gladly accepted.